I entertain the ghosts in my bedroom
with a mixture of contempt and admiration.
At night, I recite poems to blank walls;
I do not truly know anything.
The mirror lies, much to my dismay.
it does not show me anything more
Then my feelings of myself
which change minute by minute.
What world is this that I do not trust
my own swirling thoughts?
Like an artists palette, the flecks of color
from older paintings show through.
This rainbow of dreary colors,
like me, is indecipherable.
I threw away your things
that lay around my room like coiled vipers.
You had claimed my space,
what little of it there is.
I am reclaiming myself through
my kindred spirits, allowing them
to breathe their vibrant life into my heart.
I feel like water.
Let me run through your fingers,
over and under your body,
caress you and kiss you.
Only, you cannot contain me,
for when you try I will evaporate
and be gone forever.